Juneteenth & February in the US, October in the UK are all known pockets of time throughout the Gregorian calendar that many of us ''Black'' people of the diaspora give ourselves permission to just BE comfortable in our very own divinely ordained brown skins, so as to speak. Whatever the shade may be. For some, these hyper-focused periods of time shedding light on ''Black'' self-worth are the ONLY pocket's of time that we are seemingly allowed to shine. For others amongst us, there is a near daily effort of intentional attachment of our significance to extend beyond the creation's eyes and to see our value through the lens of The Creator's eyes.
During these periods of time, celebrating and acknowledging contemporary break- through the glass ceiling moments & achievements against all the systemic, societal constructs & policies that deny equal rights to be just as much a human being than those who benefit from the so called 'privileges'.
But are we ''Black'' people of the diaspora reeeally allowing each other to be comfortable in our own divinely ordained brown skins? Are we really welcoming the 'Black'' woman, whatever her shade or ethnical and or cultural background to enter the spaces we create under the 'for ''Black'' women' banner?
Is she, the ''Black'' Hispanic really allowed to enter the space?
Is she the ''Black'' Brazilian really allowed to enter the space?
Is she the ''Black'' Seminole really allowed to enter the space?
Is she the ''Black'' Arab really allowed to enter the space?
Is she the ''Black'' West African really allowed to enter the space?
Is she the ''Black'' East African really allowed to enter the space?
Is she the ''Black'' South African really allowed to enter the space?
Is she, if a mix of all the above really allowed to enter the space?
Is she, the light skinned ''bi-racial'' really allowed to enter the space?
Is she, the dark skinned ''bi-racial'' really allowed to enter the space?
Is she the Afro-Caribbean really allowed to enter the space?
Is she the ''Black'' Indian really allowed to enter the space?
Is she the Chagossian allowed to enter the space?
Is she the Nubian really allowed to enter the space?
Is she the ''Black'' European really allowed to enter the space?
Is she the third culture ''Black'' woman really allowed to enter the space?
Is she, a woman of African heritage of a particular religion really allowed to enter the space?
Is she, a woman of African heritage of a particular religious creed really allowed to enter the space?
Is she, a ''Black'' atheist really allowed to enter the space?.
(Oh, my God. I am so tired just from typing out the rainbow of brown bodies, and can you believe that this is by far not an exhaustive list?!),
AND more importantly, sis...
Are you really allowing yourself to hold space with grace for you?
As someone on a life-long healing journey, I find that holding space for yourself is an act that takes time, and once you get it, it doesn't mean you have it, but rather it's a conscious practice requiring conscious effort. Until when? Until it becomes second nature? I'm not so sure. Don't gurus also slip from time to time and are tested with what they know?
As you're reading this, you as the reader might be thinking is the writer of this blog able to hold space for the aforementioned ''Black'' women? You know...that's a good question, and thank you for asking. I think for quite a while that's been on the back burner of my mind simmering, and I can safely say that, if we were all to gather with the intention of growth, hearing each other, learning from one another and holding space I'd find little difficulty in doing that. With where I am at now in my healing journey, I have little tolerance with being tolerated and love to be where I can celebrate and be celebrated.
Having said that, I'm currently reading a book - that's taking me forever to finish - where a Malcolm X inspired author goes on a deep dive to explore unconscious bias, and racial societal conditioning that can be internalised. It discusses racism and beyond. The book is called 'How to Be an Antiracist' by Ibram X Kendi. If you're familiar with it and you've reached the finish line, drop a comment and share your insights on the book. I hear that he also has another book that came out afterwards on how to raise anti-racist children. It's never enough to just say that one is not racist, right?! We've got to be actively putting effort against racism into practice.
Previously, when I did interview others in my podcast ''Black'' Woman Speaks Arabic, I did make sure to host a myriad of inspirational ''Black'' women from various backgrounds and creeds. I loved it. If you do too, then drop a comment. Haven't heard of it, yet?! Well what are you waiting for, sis? Have an eaves drop, here.
So, what does holding space for yourself look like sis? How do you reach out to, connect to and express your cultural identity? And how can it help you hold space for others who may have a different background to you despite sharing an African identity with you however, small or large a percent of African heritage you or they may carry? Not sure and want to find out?
Would you like to know what it looks like to tap into and express how you identify with the various cultures you relate to in a creative and introspective atmosphere? Then come to my upcoming Afrabics - Africa With a Splash of Africa taster workshop. This is an invitation to cease saying I only embrace a part of me, because society doesn't accept me entirely, but instead to be curious about the cultural identities that have passed onto me and in efforts to enhance my self-awareness, I will give them a voice.
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